This should have applied to the “stimulus” boondoggle, but it’s too late for that, now.
While continuing to fight with the pattern for my dress (photos soon, barring any further complications), I was, again, listening to Fox News. Greta van Susteren was interviewing Bristol Palin.
My paraphrase of Ms. Palin’s comment on abstinence: “Well, gee, I mean, everyone should be abstinent, but… that’s not really practical.”
Translation: “It’s too hard, so why bother?” Welcome to Christianity, Bristol. If it’s all easy, you’re probably missing something.
As G.K. Chesterton once pointed out, “Christianity has not been tried and found wanting… it’s been found hard and not tried.” And, I would add, if you aren’t finding Christianity at least a little bit hard, then you probably aren’t trying.
One of the talking heads on O’Reilly, after viewing the clip of Ms. Palin, chimed in, “That’s right! We tell our kids, ‘Don’t do drugs. Don’t drink.’ Parents need to be telling their kids, ‘Don’t get pregnant,’ too.”
Hmmm. Remember that section on the SAT where you’re asked which relationship doesn’t match? You know, A: foot-sock, B: head-hat, C: bellybutton-sunglasses, D: hand-glove.
Apparently, the psychologist talking head missed that part.
If I took her advice on what to tell my kids about sex and made the first two admonitions match the relationship, they’d be: “Don’t get AIDS from a shared needle. Don’t get caught drinking.”
How stupid and ridiculously short-sighted, you’d say, and you’d be right. Drugs and underage drinking have lots of other consequences, short and long term, besides those specific dangers.
So does premarital sex.
If parents tell their kids, “Just don’t get pregnant,” well, they just told their kids that that’s what’s important: avoiding pregnancy. They failed to emphasize the whole package: the dangers of STD’s (including infertility), the psychological damage of early and/or casual sex, and having enough respect for yourself to tell the boyfriend/girlfriend/friend with *benefits* “No.” Not to mention the long-term effects on your likelihood for a successful marriage (hint: they don’t improve with premarital sex). If the main objective is just to avoid getting pregnant, then everything else is ok, or at least not as wrong as getting pregnant, right?
One of the adoption lists I read had a thread about a nasty sexual harrassment incident, involving rumors of Chinese women’s alleged traits. The twelve-year-old who was harrassed in a bookstore was mortified that her parents made a stink with the manager and the police (the three boys in question were handcuffed and had to wait for their parents to come get them). She told her mom she should’ve dropped it, because, “When it’s happened before, I just walked away.” Mom was, understandably, shocked when she heard some of what her daughter’s “friends” had said to her about the expected physical characteristics of Asian women that made them look forward to being old enough to have sex with her.
A member of the list huffily responded, “See?! That’s what happens from the prevalence of porn in our culture and this archaic insistence on treating sex as something sacred. If we just taught sex as biology, this wouldn’t have happened.”
After having gotten my head bit off by this particular person, I was not inclined to get into it with her, but isn’t “sex only as biology” exactly how we got here? If it’s just biology and the only sin involved is getting pregnant, then, logically, why shouldn’t we have porn? Why shouldn’t her friends have been lobbying for “first dibs” on sex with this girl because she’s assumed to have wonderful physical characteristics? If it’s “only biology,” why was anyone offended?
Obviously, we are offended because sex is so much more than “only biology” and pregnancy is not the only consequence of it.
I’m sure all the boys in question were well-schooled in “just don’t get her pregnant” and “it’s all okay,” which is the theme of Planned Parenthood’s sex education program for public schools. (yep, your tax dollars at work to get some brand recognition ingrained in your kids…) Of course, getting pregnant is not ok, but Planned Parenthood is really good at *fixing* that.
Just because it gives a temporary high, teens are naturally curious, it’s fun, it doesn’t seem to hurt anyone, most people don’t get penalized for it (at least not obviously), and, hey, “everyone is doing it, anyways,” we don’t give our kids the go-ahead on drugs and drinking. We categorically tell them not to do it.
So why do we give in to the same dumb excuses on sex and try to hide under the dodge of “just being reasonable”?
Just say no.